The 8 Best Quotes from The Lost Boys (1987)

Joel Schumacher’s The Lost Boys (1987) follows brothers Michael and Sam when they move with their mother to Santa Carla, California. There, Michael is quickly seduced by a gang of motorcycle-riding, leather-jacket wearing vampires led by the enigmatic David. What ensues is a sublime mix of horror and comedy that has solidified The Lost Boys as a true cult classic. It even inspired its own comic book series, two sequel movies, and a modern remake.

Below, let’s look at 8 of the best quotes from the original The Lost Boys.

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“My own brother, a … vampire. You wait ’til Mom finds out, buddy!” – Sam Emerson

While the above quote is edited a bit, it still retains its form as the absolute best Lost Boys quote. Truly, this is about as realistic a reaction you could have to your brother becoming a vampire. Sam delivers it with the energy of a preteen about to tell on a teenager for drinking or doing drugs. But the absurdity is elevated by the fact that no, he’s going to rat out Michael for being a fictional monster. This was truly an inspired script moment.

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“Don’t kill me, Mike. I’m basically a good kid.” – Sam Emerson

Sam definitely has the funniest lines throughout the entire movie. He’s young and sweet, but also foul-mouthed and disrespectful to authority figures. Thus when he discovers his brother is turning into a creature of the night, he makes a desperate plea. Little does he know that the innocents always die first! Luckily for Sam, however, Michael has no interest in feeding from his little bro.

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“Maggots, Michael. You’re eating maggots.” – David

The Lost Boys‘ Chinese takeout scene is one of its most famous. In it, the vampire gang leads Michael to their underground hideout. While they’re all chowing down on noodles, David uses his powers to make Michael believe he’s eating worms. Then, when Michael thinks he’s safe with the rice, David makes Michael see maggots. Mind games over a midnight snack are just brutal. But what else can we expect from a perpetual teenage boy?

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“You’d better get yourself a garlic T-shirt, buddy, or it’s your funeral.” – Edgar Frog

The Frog brothers are quite the comedic duo. Like Sam, their youth affords them the silliest and snarkiest lines. Plus, since the two kids work at a comic book shop, they’re full of pop culture knowledge and quips. When Sam reveals his brother is probably a vampire, the Frog brothers are quick to offer solutions ranging from basic — garlic-infused outerwear — to far more extreme measures.

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“Kill your brother, you’ll feel better.” – Alan Frog

That aforementioned extreme advice? It’s to kill Michael. Sam is freaking out about the vampire problem in his new home. The Frogs, who behave like little soldiers, don’t have an emotional attachment to their so-called sworn enemies. Instead, they care about humans such as Sam. So they put their heads together and suggest a single solution to two problems. In their minds, Sam will be less stressed and there will be one less vampire in the world if Sam just murders his beloved brother. No big deal, right?

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“You don’t have to beat me, Michael. You just have to try and keep up.” – David

The Lost Boys explores classic ’80s themes such as peer pressure and the slightly homoerotic competition between teenage boys — except with vampires. Seriously, it’s one of the best movies of all time. But we digress. David’s above quote is cool because it shows his true character. He’s smug but also pretty fair. He knows the human/fledgling vampire Michael can’t accomplish superhuman feats just yet. But David will have fun watching Michael try his best, especially because Michael intrigues David so much. His entire motivation, after all, is to get Michael to join the gang.

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“It’s too late. My blood is in your veins.” – David

“So is mine!” – Michael

There’s a lot to unpack in this dialogue — more than we can possibly fit here, really. But suffice it to say that this one is on the list because it’s Michael’s hero moment. When all seems lost, David shouts triumphantly that it’s too late for Michael. David’s vampire blood will turn Michael into a full vampire once Michael makes his first kill. Enraged, Michael screams that he still has his own blood — meaning he’s still part human, and not a killer like David wants. Refusing to join David, he impales the young vampire on antlers.

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“One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach: all the damn vampires.” – Grandpa Emerson

Okay, Grandpa. Way to drop that bomb right at the end of the movie. Literally — this is the last line. After being pretty checked out of the horrific events happening in his house, the eccentric Grandpa Emerson reveals he’s been aware of the vampire population all along. You’d think he would have warned his daughter and grandsons before they moved! But if he had, we wouldn’t have this iconic ’80s flick to revisit again and again.

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