Thorsday Edition Marvel Matchup: Thor vs Deadpool
Wade Wilson served as mercenary for many powerful government organizations. He was dangerous, lethal, and unpredictable. But worst of all, in the eyes of those government organizations, he had a strict code of honor. He’d kill anyone for a good buck — except for women and children. He just wouldn’t do it!
And after some highly-experimental enhancement tests went wrong, he was shipped off to the Weapon X program, where he went through many more experimental enhancements. Finally, after another round or two of torturous experiments and inhumane methods, Wade Wilson snapped.
He used his new found insanity (or perhaps ultra-clarity) to make his way to the top, acting as a mercenary for hire, and even sometimes a good guy alongside Spider-Man, the Avengers, and more! And let’s not forget that he is one of the founding members of the Deadpool Corps, the band of equally chatty Deadpools from across the multiverse.
Deadpool’s primary ability is his regenerative healing factor. This ability grants him a level of immortality (depending on the comic, it may actually be because of his relationship with Death) and disease immunity. Deadpool‘s cells and neurons are changing so frequently, that it’s difficult to possess him and basically impossible to telepathically read his mind. He is so unpredictable that even Taskmaster cannot copy his fighting style! With all of his augmentations, he has a range of superhuman abilities from strength to durability and more.
Deadpool typically uses katanas and a great many guns in combat. His most interesting power of all, however, is his Medium Awareness. He knows that he is a fictional character! He knows whether he’s in a movie, a game, a comic book, or even a blog post. On some occasions his Medium Awareness allows him to break the rules of the world and directly interact with comic book panels, speech bubbles, and more.
Other characters in his stories perceive his Medium Awareness as insanity, and it’s not totally unreasonable to think so, because he is still a bit insane. He constantly comes up with new stories about himself and believes them whole-heartedly, even if there’s proof that they’re wrong. DP once even had the supervillain Madcap stuck inside his brain, making him sound even crazier than usual (if you can believe it).
He’s also scared of cows (bovinophobia) and pretty much every hero in the Marvel Universe thinks Deadpool is the most annoying man alive. Friends are hard to come by, but he’s optimistic nevertheless.
Thor is the son of Odin, the Allfather, and Gaea, the Elder Goddess of Earth. His character has been around so long that there are countless origin stories, some from Norse Mythology and many from Marvel Comics. The condensed version is this: Odin sent Thor, young and arrogant, to Earth to prove he was worthy of wielding the legendary weapon named Mjolnir. There, he learned humility and was able to claim his birthright once more.
Thor has Asgardian and Elder God blood. His strength is immeasurable, and he is effectively invulnerable. He is not immortal, but he ages very slowly. He can heal from most wounds. He can speak in all languages. He can fly. And of course, he can control the weather, primarily storms.
His signature weapon, Mjolnir, allows him to channel his godly energy and use it in innumerable ways. Mjolnir allows him to teleport, control vast amounts of energy, fly at great speeds, transform into a civilian form (Donald Blake), and more. Most importantly, he can only wield Mjolnir if he is truly worthy of it.
In some versions of Thor’s powers, he can only be Thor while holding Mjolnir. And though these stories are generally outdated, there is something to be said about his connection to Mjolnir itself.
Much of his currently realized power comes through Mjolnir, and so if he was unworthy, he would lose many of its abilities. Additionally, if Odin is alive, then Thor cannot fully access the Odinforce.
This fight could go one of two ways. Here’s the simple route: Thor is a god, and Deadpool knows it.
But if they really going all out, Deadpool would have to use every power in his arsenal just to have a chance. Thor is extremely powerful and could vaporize Deadpool with a single blast of lightning, or literally punch him through a planet. (Once, Deadpool even asked Thor and Luke Cage to rip him in two halves, which they easily accomplished.)
But Deadpool is much more unpredictable than Thor. So if Deadpool was able to use his teleportation belt to escape Thor, he could outlive him. Deadpool is actually immortal. However, if Thor has access to the Odinforce as the Allfather of Asgard, this would give the thunderer nearly unlimited power. So Deadpool would have to think quick and act quicker. (And maybe wait until Thor falls into an Odinsleep.)
Perhaps Deadpool’s Medium Awareness could allow him to circumnavigate the rules of the fight. He might know that even if he’s defeated, he’ll just come back in another comic. But is that really winning a fight?
There are too many possibilities to count, but don’t discount Deadpool just because he’s not a god!
Who do you think would win in a fight?